Gotta have Faith!

Isaiah 41:10

Salutations followers of our little journey!

It has been awhile since our last post. To be honest, I have been struggling the last several months spiritually. I could not tell you exactly when it happened, but I had a little falling out with God. I feel that God has been working in our lives, and I still see his hand in many areas of our lives. Yet for some reason, I just stopped talking to him. I can only guess that the last few months I have been acting like a toddler throwing a tantrum and giving God the silent treatment for not moving our journey along like I think it should be. For the last few weeks at church, we have been discussing what we are obsessed with. When I took the assessment, I found out I am obsessed with being in control. This obsession has been blocking my growth spiritually. Case in point, acting like a toddler with God when I don’t get my way on this journey! I was shocked by the assessment at first because I have always thought of myself as a laid-back, go with the flow kind of person. Taking a deeper look at my life, I quickly saw areas where control was an issue. For a long time, I have been saying I am putting God in control, but never fully letting go so that God could do his work. This past week, I have stepped up twice to let others/God have control of situations. I was uncomfortable and completely wrecked with worry, but then when I worked through those emotions, I began to see what could happen when I truly listened to God. I learned about myself, others learned from it, and my shield was taken down a little for me and others to see God shining through those moments. Now can I say that I have conquered my obsession with control? Not by a long shot, but I am more aware of it and taking it one day at a time trying to hear what God wants me to do about it.

On the Spinraza front, we are going to see a hematologist at UC on Tuesday with hopes that they will have some suggestions on how we can get Chris started on the injections. We have been keeping up with others that are taking the injections and hearing that it is not a miracle drug. Yet it is a drug that can make improvements on people’s everyday lives. This is promising and a much-needed drug for many with SMA. Any improvement is better than the alternative. While I want this next step on our journey to be full of positive information, I am putting it in the hands of God to control without trying to keep my hand in it. I just ask that you pray for God’s hands to be all over our future with this journey and all areas of our lives. Also, I know that others on similar journeys have been having ups and downs. I ask that you join us in praying for others on their own Spinraza journey to keep strong and see that God will help them through their ups and downs.

Thank you all for reading and taking an interest in our small corner of the world. May God bless you all!